mandymom.com Blog » Funny

“Babies don’t come from doctors…”

MandyMom — Thu, 29 May 2008 15:55:11 +0000

My dear, dear, rambunctious little booger boy was ~~irritating~~ playing with the dog, receiving little nips in return. “Nolyn, becareful, I don’t want her to get a little too frisky and bite you!” I explained. “Don’t hurt her, just play gently! Gently!”

He gave me this adorable dimpled grin and replied, “‘Cause den I’d have to go to da doctor and have a baby!”
I began laughing, especially when my daughter, hands on her hips and scowl on her face informed him that “babies don’t come from doctors. Nolyn, babies come from home and Daddy helps!!”

What can I say? My daughter has been passionate about home births since we had an unassisted homebirth with Keagan!

You might be an unschooling family if…

MandyMom — Wed, 07 May 2008 20:28:09 +0000

-Your children learn geometry from playing billiards (or pool, if you prefer).
-Fractions were figured out whilst making cookies, cakes, and casseroles.
-Your son’s first chemistry experiment occured when he figured out eating beets turned his “tinkle” an orangey-red hue.
-You sometimes have mini-panic attacks and think, “Oh my goodness, I need to load up on curriculum and teach these children something!”
-And then your children spurt out something amazingly intelligent and you think, “Ha, nevermind.”
-Yesterday’s lessons included stuff like, “How to get jelly stains out of the carpet”, “Where does poop go when it’s flushed down the toilet?”, “Oh, and what happens when you use ten times the regular amount of toilet paper, then try to flush it all at once?” along with “What sort of mental effect will this have on Mom when she sees we’ve flooded the bathroom?”.
-You find out the reason your children speak fluent Czeck and a little German is because they’ve been calling Prague on your cellphone. Hmm, that explains the outrageous bill.
-The excuse for everything gone awry is, “We were conducting an experiment.” Unfortunately, the fire department doesn’t think that’s a great reason.

BTW…… I’m adding new blogs to my blogroll! Please, check them out!

20 Reasons Why Homeschooling ROCKS!

MandyMom — Tue, 04 Mar 2008 18:42:40 +0000

A bigger version of this cartoon (which makes for better quality when printed) is HERE.

Unschooling (Discipleship) ABCs

MandyMom — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 21:32:55 +0000

A is for active learning. Applying knowledge in a way that it sticks by living it!
B is for books. Take your children to the book store or library and let them pick out things they want to look at or read. (And take the time to read to them when they ask.)
C is for cooking. Let your children help you! That’s reading, math, and chemistry!
D is for discipleship. Allow your children to follow you around, to copy you, to ask as many questions as they desire. Keep them close to you and remember, pay attention to what you say and do… because you can bet they are!
E is for exploring. We are all born with a natural curiosity! Don’t squelch it in your children!
F is for field trips. Museums, parks, and beaches. Amusement parks and fairs. Rodeos and farms! Get out there!
G is for gardening. Kids love to get dirty, and they love to watch things grow!
H is for helping. We all know you can fold the clothes better, clean the house quicker, and do everything in an efficient manner….. but allow your children to get involved! The extra time is worth it!
I is for interests. Let your children’s interests guide you!
J is for journal. Write down what you’ve done at the end of the day. It’s always encouraging to look back and make note of what your children have learned without force and pressure.
K is for kidding. Take time to laugh, giggle, and joke with your children. Humor is good for the soul!
L is for listening. Do a lot of it.
M is for money. Give your children an allowance, even if it’s small. This teaches them how to tithe, save, and spend.
N is for natural. Don’t forget that learning is natural. It happens as we live!
O is for observation. Children learn quite a bit from observing, whether its watching tv, watching you, or watching the world!
P is for passion. Find out what your children are passionate about and help them pursue those things. Music? Karate? Art? Dancing? Rocket Science? Whatever it is, help them reach their goals.
Q is for questions. Sometimes the endless questions are irritating, but it’s part of the growing process. Again, children are naturally curious. Don’t stomp that out by refusing to answer their questions or shrugging them off because you’re ”too busy”.
R is for repairing. Let your children look on (or even help, if possible) as you or your spouse repair things. This can produce a useful trade for them in their future (or at least save money because they know how to do it themselves).
S is for storytelling. Whether it’s fact or fiction, sit down with your munchkins and share a story. I have many wonderful memories from my childhood, sitting on the couch with dad as he told us magical stories and sent us on awesome adventures.
T is for toys! Keep fun, educational toys and games around your home. Play together as a family!
U is for understanding. Remember, we all make mistakes. It’s part of learning. Be understanding when they mess up, break something, or get hurt.
V is for volunteering. Go help your community. Make sack lunches for the homeless. Visit the elderly in nursing homes. This helps your children become responsible citizens!
W is for why. Turn things around. Ask your children WHY!
X is for Xerox. Okay, so it’s hard to find something for X, but Xeroxing is so much fun! Every child should get to do it! (Just.. not your rearend, okay?)
Y is for yes. Figure out ways to say Yes more than you say No.
Z is for Zzzzzz. Make bedtime enjoyable. Read books. Sing songs. Say a prayer. Give them many kisses and prepare to do it all over again tomorrow!

What are your favorite personal homeschooling ABCs?

How much?

MandyMom — Sat, 02 Feb 2008 02:35:10 +0000

I love you.
I love you, too honey.
I love you, three, Mom!
I love you times one-hundred!
Well…. I love you times a septendecillion!
Um… what?

No, it’s not an antibiotic, it’s
1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000.
That’s a lot of zeros.
And folks, that’s a lot of love.

(Btw, where do they learn these things, and is that how much money Oprah has?)

Artsy Fartsy, T-shirt Transformations, and More

MandyMom — Tue, 23 Oct 2007 19:23:16 +0000

We had a blast yesterday. I covered the table with contact paper before letting the kids go wild on a couple canvases I had laying around. Contact paper was a great idea. They don’t realize the table is protected, so they are still very careful. Of course, they still managed to get paint on it, but I wasn’t worried because I knew it wasn’t a big deal. I could wipe it off, and if the paint didn’t come off completely, I didn’t have to worry about it. Unlike table cloths, the contact paper won’t slip off. Plus, the adhesive on the contact paper won’t ruin the table.

While waiting for the paintings to dry (we’re going to work on them a bit more later today), I pulled out an old t-shirt of mine and transformed it into accessories for the critters. A cap for Keagan out of the sleeve, a “Ninja” headband for Nolyn out of the bottom seam, and a dress and bracelets out of the body part for Merikalyn. Then we ventured over to the restaurant to show Daddy the fabulous transformations. It was a great laugh for us all.

Nolyn and Merika are wearing their special aprons we decorated before Keagan was born. Nolyn’s doubles as a super hero cape (shh, don’t tell anyone).

Today we took advantage of the first burst of cool weather and headed outdoors. The kids get a huge thrill from digging in the dirt. Ah, remember when the simple things were oh-so-fun? We watched Daddy and Uncle Ryan demolish the old shed (damaged by Hurricane Rita and left by previous owners) for a bit before I decided it would be best for baby to head back indoors. Now Merika is flipping through a Cat in the Hat book while Nolyn cracks plastic easter eggs into a bowl. I asked him what he was cooking. His reponse?

“I cookin’ a dirtbay cake ….. for me!”

Point to Ponder & Humor for Homeschoolers

MandyMom — Sat, 20 Oct 2007 21:19:01 +0000

Here’s a serious quote, followed by homeschooling humor.

In a nutshell, people whose lives are hard, boring, painful, meaningless — people who suffer — tend to resent those who seem to suffer less than they do, and will make them suffer if they can. People who feel themselves in chains, with no hope of ever getting them off, want to put chains on everyone else. [John Holt]

You Know You’re A Homeschooling Mama When…

You get caught talking to yourself and claim you’re having a PTA meeting.

You take off for a “teacher’s inservice day” because the principal needs clean boxer briefs.

Then teacher gets to kiss the principal in the faculty lounge and no one gossips.

You can’t make it through the grocery produce department without asking your preschooler the name and color of every vegetable.